“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company…a church…a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play the one string we have, and that is our attitude…I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you…we are in charge of our attitudes.”

[DISPLAY_ULTIMATE_SOCIAL_ICONS]

——-Unattributed, as quoted in a daily meditation from www.livinglifefully.com

• Calm in challenging situations
• On target with insights and direction
• Networking with purpose
• Faithful to our dreams
• Illuminated by clear vision
• Drawn to confident models
• Enlightened by reflection
• Neighborly to those in need
• Thankful for all who support

——written after reflecting on the Confidence workshops

In the beloved classic “The Wizard of Oz,” the Cowardly Lion sings longingly of finding courage. He wishes to fulfill his role as King of the Jungle but is lacking the tools necessary to move forward and claim this job. If he were in one of the confidence workshops he would say that his cup was completely empty. The obstacles in his life have caused him to forget that he is still in control of his attitude, and the loss of a positive attitude has caused his strength to ebb away. He suffers deeply and cannot move forward—but he can make a lateral move. He can move over to people in need and help Dorothy in her quest to find the Wizard and go home. And in helping Dorothy and her friends, the Cowardly Lion rediscovers a positive attitude. He finds his courage and is able to help himself and claim his role in his community.

Life is all about quests: we dream, we journal, we plan, we may pray. We search for meaning, for life partners and friends, for a job we love and excel in. But when we lose our job, our quests can all come to a halt. I know that my job was my community definition: it wasn’t what I did, it was who I was.

The loss of my job–a job I loved–completely undermined me. I felt diminished as a person as well as a worker. When people tried to console me, I heard their words but I could not really listen and accept their solace. My cup of confidence ran out as I held that pink slip and realized that all my efforts to fight this job loss had failed and I had become a recession statistic. My attitude became defeatist and I didn’t even realize this had happened.

But perhaps the most monumental piece of advice was to make sure I did volunteer work. This is the lateral move I referred to when the cowardly lion agreed to accompany Dorothy and her friends to get their hearts’ desire. Often when we are being hard on ourselves it is impossible to believe we deserve help, but we can still be touched by others’ needs. In a beautiful paradox, when we reach out to offer help to our neighbors we recall our own competencies and can regain our confidence. This beautiful dance of mutual benefit renews our quest and improves the welfare of our community.

In my case, inspired by a confidence workshop, I called my daughter’s elementary school to offer to volunteer in a classroom or tutor a child who needed extra help. A few days before I began, the school called back and the administrative assistant said: “Since you’re willing to work for free, we thought you might like to work and get paid!” I was offered a part time job as a special education assistant. Three months later, the job became full time. Offering to help others nurtured my own confidence and helped me to find new, worthwhile work. A healthy attitude directed me back to a positive journey.

Our quest never ends: we must nurture ourselves through confidence walks, practicing and imagining scenarios where we step up to the plate and hit the most powerful home run we can. We must consistently give ourselves permission to take our ‘Bubble Bath Days’ and renew our spirits. We must keep the lines of communication open and embrace networking and the support of family and friends. We must keep ourselves finely tuned and professional (Taking some of the confidence courses through Metrix Learning and getting them on a LinkedIn profile is very impressive to interviewers and perspective employers). Thankfully, help is always an email, or a workshop, or a coffee shop away. Some may fear that becoming strong and confident can lead to arrogance. A life lived in gratitude ensures that our confidence will be healthy, not harmful. And so reach out! Reach out and believe in yourself again.

—–submitted by “Mamie”
Confidence Workshop Attendee

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